Right or practical?
Published by Mysorean on Tuesday, August 02, 2005 at 9:30:00 pm.
Two incidents, strikingly similar in nature, occured recently. Lets have a look.
Now, what is the similarity between the two incidents? It's the distinction between the employer and the human being within us. An excerpt from a mail I wrote to my roomies during the decision-making summarises the situation best:
"We have hired the lady for cooking. By hiring her we have agreed to bear the risks that come with her being a cook. If as a parent/ wife/ sister she is facing a problem, I don't think as her employers we have any stake in that. But as benevolent people, we feel it's our duty to help her out. In which case, we should do that as good human beings and not as her employers. We are paying her for being our cook and (morally) that salary should not be reduced in order to payback the goodness that we are bestowing upon her."
However possible the idealistic thought may be, we didn't want to donate the Rs. 500/- per head that it would work out to for the well-being of our maid servant's son. There were many reasons. I will summarise the two best ones that I heard in defense of this argument. #2 is that she will never realise the value of money if we just give it away as donation. #1 is that we are not sure if the reason she is giving is fake or real. This is similar to what my colleague did. She also paid her baby-sitter a certain amount and began recovering the amount from her salary.
She is asking you for the money because she knows the value of it. You don't have to teach her it's value. Her son is in the hospital, somebody is ill, and the money you give will relieve her of her problems. Who knows the value of that money better than the person experiencing the situation? We. We know. We just want our money back. It's hard-earned. I can't throw it away on donation to our maid, whom I don't trust! (If you trust, don't expect the money back, you have done something good. If you don't trust, don't give her money.)
We are not ready to invest our time and energy in finding out if the reason is genuine. We just want to wash our hands off the situation by giving the money and putting a clause that she has to return it. By adding the clause, even her problem is solved and you also get the hope that your money will be returned. Of course, you are also doing her value system a great help by making her realise the value of money. It's definitely a practical way of living in today's circumstances. But is it the right way?
Tomorrow: Mumbai - Is it all worth it?
First one: We (I stay in a flat with 3 of my ex-batchmates from BIM) hired a cook for breakfast and dinner. She worked properly for about a month. Came on time. Cooked well. Washed all the utensils and kept up her quality of interaction with us. One day, she asked Prabhakar (one of my roomies) for Rs. 2000/- since her son was admitted to the hospital. Prabhakar gave her Rs. 1000/- and told her that the remaining amount will be given after discussion with us. Inspite of various points of view, the most practical and good natured option appeared to be giving her the remaining Rs. 1000/-. But the rider was that, we will recover it from here salary spread over a period of 4 months.
Second one: My colleague has hired a baby-sitter for the past few months to look after her 18 month old son - Adi (It's a good name you know!). Everything was going fine. The baby-sitter belongs to a place nearby Salem. Adi began warming up to her very well. One fine day, the baby-sitter tells my colleague that she needs to go home over the weekend as somebody (I don't remember who) was ill. Apart from leaving my colleague in the lurch for the weekend she also had the audacity (I am so cruel na?!) to ask for money to pay the hospital bills. My colleage pretty moved by the story, paid her an all-expenses borne trip to her place.
Now, what is the similarity between the two incidents? It's the distinction between the employer and the human being within us. An excerpt from a mail I wrote to my roomies during the decision-making summarises the situation best:
"We have hired the lady for cooking. By hiring her we have agreed to bear the risks that come with her being a cook. If as a parent/ wife/ sister she is facing a problem, I don't think as her employers we have any stake in that. But as benevolent people, we feel it's our duty to help her out. In which case, we should do that as good human beings and not as her employers. We are paying her for being our cook and (morally) that salary should not be reduced in order to payback the goodness that we are bestowing upon her."
However possible the idealistic thought may be, we didn't want to donate the Rs. 500/- per head that it would work out to for the well-being of our maid servant's son. There were many reasons. I will summarise the two best ones that I heard in defense of this argument. #2 is that she will never realise the value of money if we just give it away as donation. #1 is that we are not sure if the reason she is giving is fake or real. This is similar to what my colleague did. She also paid her baby-sitter a certain amount and began recovering the amount from her salary.
She is asking you for the money because she knows the value of it. You don't have to teach her it's value. Her son is in the hospital, somebody is ill, and the money you give will relieve her of her problems. Who knows the value of that money better than the person experiencing the situation? We. We know. We just want our money back. It's hard-earned. I can't throw it away on donation to our maid, whom I don't trust! (If you trust, don't expect the money back, you have done something good. If you don't trust, don't give her money.)
We are not ready to invest our time and energy in finding out if the reason is genuine. We just want to wash our hands off the situation by giving the money and putting a clause that she has to return it. By adding the clause, even her problem is solved and you also get the hope that your money will be returned. Of course, you are also doing her value system a great help by making her realise the value of money. It's definitely a practical way of living in today's circumstances. But is it the right way?
Tomorrow: Mumbai - Is it all worth it?
